Exchanging smiles
by Vhirdi
Summary: F! ShepardxGarrus rated m because of sexual content later on. Takes place in the FIRST Mass Effect game.
1. Chapter 1

This is a story about my f!shepard and Garrus in the first mass effect game. I have not played the other two games yet, so I appologise in advance if Garrus is ooc. This takes place before the Virmire mision and my Shepard is generally paragon. I do not own any of Mass Effect's character's that honor belongs to Bioware. Rated m for sexual content later on.

I was working on the Mako when she came in. She always seemed to be around after an important mission, to get the crew's oppinion I suppose. She would do her routine, talk to Wrex, then Ashley, then Tali and last she would talk to me. She always seemed very interested in my backstory, I admit that she is a very good listener, but something was different when she talked to me. She would open her mouth and show her teeth everytime I made eyecontact with her and I can't figure out why. It has to have something to do with their race's customs, I will have to ask Luitenant Alenko, from what I pick up about their interactions they are close. Sometimes the commander would only buy something from the merchant on the lower deck, but I would always notice her eyes lingering on me just a little longer than they were supposed to. I had different theories about her behaviour, it might be because she wants to show she is dominant, I am not sure how humans display dominance but it is an option, or it could be because she was experimenting on my species, she had been asking a whole lot of questions lately... It is a riddle to me, not only is she from the opposite sex, she is also an entirely different species.

I finished up my work and went looking for Luitenant Alenko, not being able to locate him I decided to question Joker about the commander's behaviour, since he was the next young human male on the ship. Joker seemed to be startled when I spoke to him "Excuse me, Joker, would you be willing to answer some questions for me?" He looked back at me and nodded seeming to think deeply while he did so. "What do you want to know?" He asked me, looking a bit cautiously. "It is about commander Sheppard, I do not understand her behavior and I was hoping you could enlighten me." He visibly relaxed when he heard this was about Sheppard. "Well, I'm not sure I understand her all the time, but I could try." He offered. I nodded and explained "Whenever the commander comes by the lower deck to hear us out on our opinion on the mision she always makes a point of talking to me last, but while she is talking to others she still seems to keep an eye on me. Also whenever I make eyecontact she bares her teeth and I do not understand what kind of messages she is sending by doing this." At first Joker laughed for a minute and then he said "I'm guessing baring her teeth is her idea of a smile, she has never been very good at that, for the rest I have no clue. But either way, you will probably want to ask Luitenant Alenko about this matter." He then mumbled something about getting back to work. While walking away I could still hear him snickering which gave me the sense that he did not tell everything he knew.

As I made my way to the elevator I saw luitenant Alenko on his usual spot, I walked up to him. "Lieutenant Alenko, could you answer some questions about the commander for me?" The lieutenant narrowed his eyes suspiciously but agreed. "Have you noticed the commander's strange behaviour lately?" I asked, hoping to find an answer. "Not in particular, what's strange about her behaviour?" The lieutenant asked still watching me with suspision. "She seems to be keeping a close eye on me lately, she smiles alot too. Is there a second meaning to smiling in your culture?" The lieutenant seemed to be in deep thought.

Kaiden p.o.v.  
This Turian really thought the commander was in love with him, huh? It was obvious, if it was even true. Why did Vakarian even tell him all of this? To make him jealous, or maybe, just maybe the former c-sec officer didn't understand the signs the commander was giving him... I can make use of that, what should I tell him... "Smiling has been known to be a challenge in some human cultures." I said with a straight face, but deep inside I was laughing at his ignorance. The Turian looked even more confused now "Shepard is trying to challenge me?" I felt the corner of my mouth twitch at the use of her last name instead of saying commander and lied "She might be, I do not know. She is the opposite gender, I have no clue what she is thinking.". The turian then excused himself and I smiled triumphantly, the commander will probably think Vakarian is challenging her and that will be his downfall.

Garrus p.o.v.  
I still felt confused after getting the answer to my question, challenging? I don't know if I could win when facing Shepard in a battle, she is a strong opponent, an admirable one, she fights with precision, focus and above all grace. I find myself often thinking back to misions with her, fondly might I add, she is a perfect example for anyone in the military. Beside being good at combat she was very capable of socializing when she needed to, though she always needed to rest after a day of interacting. She is a mystery to me, one I would love to unravel. While lost in my thoughts I bump into the person occupying my thoughts "Excuse me commander, I was lost in my thoughts." She smiled and said "Be sure not to get too lost, there is still a war we need to win." She then walked off leaving me pondering on Alenko's words.

I retreated to my room and noticed something unusual, my heart was beating in a fast pace, faster than it normally does. Confused I decided to wait and see if my heart would calm down, when it finally did I was contemplating going to see doctor Chakwas to ask about it. But since the beating had returned to normal I saw no problem in it and I fell asleep at my desk. I woke up a few hours later, most of the lights in the Normandy were either dimmed or off. I had dreamt something, though I wasn't sure what. I got up and decided that I might as well get some food. At the small kitchen-like room I got some food that was brought to the ship specially for me. When the commander had heard about the diet turians have she insisted on having it on board, I ofcourse appreciated it, but I had been surviving good enough on the food I had brought myself before.

As I was eating in the kitchen I heard footsteps approach, I continued eating and waited for the footsteps to reach the kitchen. When the footsteps were almost at the door they stopped, pausing at the light coming from the kitchen probably, and then they continued. The commander stood in the door opening, her dark hair loose over her shoulders, not in the tight bun she would always wear in daytime, she wore a dark green jumpsuit with thin bands to hold it up, the lower part of her jumpsuit barely reached the middle of her thighs. Something about this sight made me stop eating and stare, she stirred something in me, though it was hard to tell what. She squinted her eyes at the light and said "I didn't expect someone to be up this late, you know eating when you're supposed to sleep is not exactly good for your body, right?" She smiled and walked over to the cooling device, where she got some thick white substance and put it in a bowl. She then sat down and ate "If it is bad for your body, then why are you eating?" She chuckled and said "Well, yoghurt is good for your body at all times, so I don't have to worry." I was confused, but the sleepy commander seemed very pleased with her answer. I assumed she was too sleepy to have a serious conversation, so I kept eating. Then I remembered what the lieutenant had told me about the commander's behaviour and I decided to ask her about it.

" Commander, when one human smiles to another, what does it mean?" The commander looked up from her meal and seemed to think as hard as a sleepy mind could. There was still some of the food she had called 'yoghurt' on the corner of her mouth, I suddenly felt compelled to wipe it off. The commander stopped eating and seemed to freeze when I leaned over, one of my fingers extended and wiped off the odd substance. At that moment Joker decided to come waltzing through the door, he seemed to freeze at my action and he immediatly walked out of the room again closing the door behind him. I wanted to taste the substance, but, remembering the time I got sick from human food, I decided against it and I wiped it on a nearby handtowel. The commander then seemed to quickly finish her meal and went away, murmuring a goodbye. As I left too I realised the commander had never answered my question.

I went to my room and fell asleep on a sofa, just large enough for my body to fit when it was half curled up. The next time I awoke it was because of noise outside of my room, sleepily I opened my door to see what was going on. My vision was a bit blurry and I rubbed my eyes. I could see lieutenant Alenko freaking out over something and Joker laughing his ass off. I decided this was not what I wanted to start the day with, so I closed my door and just lay down with my eyes closed, waiting for sleep to get me. I woke up an hour later and thought it best to get up and work a little. I put on something other than my sleeping clothes and headed for the lower deck. As I walked past Alenko he seemed to glare at me, not in the mood for human complexity I walked past him and entered the elevator. As I walked over to the Mako I greeted Ashley and heard her say something about Wrex sleeping in. I worked on the Mako for about three hours, I had written down the names of some parts that had to be replaced and made a mental note to tell this to the commander.

Then someone tapped my shoulder, I stood up and saw it was the commander I smiled and she smiled back. "It means they are fond of that person." She said, I must've looked confused because she added "About the question you wanted me to answer this morning." I then asked "Could it also be a challenge?" She thought about it and answered "It could be, yes, but normally it isn't. Are you trying to challenge me then?" She looked a tad confused as she said that. "Well, no I thought- Well, I thought you were challenging me?" I felt ignorant and stupid when I said that. But the commander laughed and said "What kind of challenge were you expecting?" I shrugged and said "I don't know, maybe a fight or something like that." She seemed to think and nodded "We could do that, a fight, I mean. On earth we would sometimes fight, but with gloves, so you wouldn't permanently damage each other. It was mostly entertainment but I still have some of those gloves." She looked very excited and I said " What are the rules then? I mean, you would have a disadvantage, my skin is made of tougher material than yours." Then Joker joined the conversation saying "The commander could wear light armor on her upperbody and you would just go shirtless, I think that is about even. I wouldn't underestimate commander Shepard's strength if I were you, most who do end up dead." I nodded and was handed a small bundle of papers bound together, it looked old. I was told the bundle of papers contained some of the rules, as they both left I realised what I had just gotten myself into and I groaned.

After meeting up with the two of them I told them I'd rather not have the whole crew watch, after some of them mocking me about it they agreed that we would fight on the middle deck (the same level as the elevator and the med clinic) and we would do so when we were docked at the Citadel and most of the crew would be out, that way we would disturb nobody. After thinking about it some longer I thought it was a pretty stupid idea, but I know that the commander won't let it go. So when we arrived at the Citadel and almost every one was out we stood on the middle deck, on opposite sides of each other. The commander in loose shorts and a light armor top with long sleeves, and me in just the lower part of my usual common clothing. Joker was the judge and sat on the side with his crutches beside him, judging by the smile on his face he was thoroughly enjoying this. As Joker counted down the commander and I circled around each other waiting patiently for an opening, the commander was less patient and lunged first. Seeing it coming I dodged her punch easily and lunged at her myself, I made contact with her armor, but not with the force I had intended to. The commander did not waste time and punched me right back, resulting in me stumbling backwards. The rules were that the first one on the ground lost, there were three rounds. The triumphant smile on Shepards face made my heart beat faster, ignoring it I lunged first pushing her back a bit. She was definitly stronger than I had expected of such a squishy looking being. She immediately punched back and I dodged it by jumping to the side, she threw another punch directly after the last one and missed by just a hair. She was out of balance and I struck her in the stomach making her fall over.

"Round one out of three, won by the turian!" Joker exclaimed, he looked like he hadn't had this much entertainment since he was first recruited. This time I was smiling triumphantly, pulling her up by her hand I noticed she was smiling too. Then came a long time of punching and dodging by both of us , something about the fight made me hold out longer, it felt as if I could fight for hours. Ofcourse that ended when a hard punch against my lower jaw landed me on the cold flooring. She could hit pretty hard, I was sure my jaw was going to be sore the next day. "Round two out of three, won by commander Shepard! Final round!" Joker yelled. I smiled at his excitement and could see Shepard doing the same, then we were on each other, punching and dodging, lunging and jumping. After about fifteen minutes of dodging I lunged at Shepard and managed to hit her shoulder, she lost balance but still hit me right in my stomach. For a second we were both silent and then I squeezed my eyes shut, prepared for the impact of the iron floor. Instead I felt my head collide with something round and I eventually landed on the ground, but not half a second later something hit me on my head again and I could feel something that had landed on my body. I groaned from the dull pain inside my head as I tried to open my eyes, at first I was crosseyed and then I could feel the weight shifting and realised it had been Shepard lieing on top of me. I didn't have much time to think about it, because I heard a voice "Commander what are you-" . I opened my eyes and saw lieutenant Alenko standing with his jaw hanging down, beside him stood a grinning Ashley. Shepard then got up a little and straddled me placing a hand against her probably aching head, she opened her eyes and everyone in the room seemed to wait for her to catch up with what had just happened. I propped myself up on my elbows as a curious Tali, Liara and Wrex had also come to see what was up. The commandrr then told everyone in a calm voice "You are all dismissed." She then took one look at me and stood up. I stood up as well and as the crew left she began laughing, I was confused for different reasons, first was because of her calm tone, second was because she was laughing and third was because she had stayed on top of me so long, secretly I had also felt somehing when she had straddled me. "Well, that didn't end quite as I had expected." The commander said, smiling. "Yeah, I'm going to leave you two now." Joker said as he got up on his crutches and went away.

The commander then held her hand out, I shook it "It was still a good fight though, it's good to know you would be able to handle yourself without weapons too." She said. "The same goes for you Shepard, you are much more than I had expected." I said as I smiled. The commander's cheeks became red at that, and I thought to myself that I really needed to read up about human anatomy and behaviour. Then unexpectedly the commander asked "What does it mean when one turian smiles to a human?" I thought about it and answered "It means they are very fond of them." I could feel embarrasment, though I did not understand why. Maybe I had unknowingly let more of my feelings slip through that sentence than I desired to. The commander seemed satisfied and touched the side of my face with her soft hand, even if it was only for a brief moment, I unconsciously leaned into her touch. She then left to replenish energy. I changed clothes and began cleaning up the mess we had made during the fight.

While I was cleaning up I heard someone speak up "Vakarian, what do you think of the commander?" I stopped cleaning and turned to see it was lieutenant Alenko, he leaned against a wall and seemed to be sad. "I think she is an admirable person and I would follow her to the end of the galaxy." I answered, knowing my words to be true. "I think so too, but she is also special to me. Is that all you think of her?" He asked again. I was a little confused, Shepard is special to me, she has changed my life, she... What more do I think of her? Is there more than just admiration? Yes. But how much more? I do not know yet, I am very fond of her, that I do know. "She is... special to me too lieutenant." I answered. The lieutenant looked me dead in the eye and said "If you are unsure of your feeling towards her, then don't mess with hers." With that he left. And I was alone once again, feeling tired I decided to go to sleep. Taking off my shirt I collapsed onto the bed in my room.

I awoke to the sound of something falling in my room, I immediately sat up and turned the lights on. My eyes reaction with less speed than my brain did I waited for them to adjust. In my room stood Shepard, her eyes were closed and she was just standing in the middle of my room. "Shepard?" I asked, my voice cracking from the fact that I had only just woken up. No reaction, I got out of my bed and walked over to her, she didn't react. She then fell over, catching her was easy as I was standing in front of her. I decided something was wrong with her and picked her up and began walking to doctor Chakwas' office. While walking Shepard seemed to cling closer to my body, maybe for warmth I thought. It would be a logical explanation since she was only wearing her jumpsuit. And while walking I noticed for the hundredth time how different her body was, it was so soft and vulnerable. Her body had some odd shapes, like her breasts, I had ofcourse had an education and through that I knew mammals had breasts, but they seemed oddly attractive on her. And then those legs, with fewer bends than most turians, yet also very alluring, the soft texture and round forms seemed so pleasant and appealing. When I was at doctor Chakwas' door I felt like I hadn't looked at Shepard enough yet, but feeling like that was inapproperiate, I opened the door. "What do you-" doctor Chakwas began, then she looked at me with confusion. "Could you explain what you are doing here?" She asked trying to sound irritated, but her voice betrayed her interest. "The commander walked into my room and will not open her eyes." I explained shortly, hoping that was enough to go on. The doctor then smiled tiredly and said "It was very sweet of you to bring her all the way here, but she was only sleepwalking. Sleepwalking is harmless, you should look it up. But I will be going to sleep soon too so it would be better if you two could leave." I nodded and began making my way to Shepards room, feeling very sleepy. As we arrived at her room the door needed a password. A password. I did not know the password. I cursed silently and made it over to my room, laying the commander on my bed and letting her get comfortable under the covers. I took an extra pair of covers and fell into a dreamless sleep. 


	2. Chapter 2

This is a story about my f!shepard and Garrus in the first mass effect game. I have not played the other two games yet, so I appologise in advance if Garrus is ooc. This takes place before the Virmire mision and my Shepard is generally paragon. I do not own any of Mass Effect's character's that honor belongs to Bioware. Rated m for sexual content later on. If I don't mention where they are, the story mostly takes place in the Normandy.

The next morning I was rudely awoken by someone shaking my arm roughly, I groaned and turned to face the other side, pulling the covers over my head. "Wake up, Vakarian." Growling I opened my eyes to be met with Alenko's irritated ones. "Why are you in my room?" I asked with more than a hint of annoyance. "The commander ordered me to wake you up, we're going on a mission." I sat up and waved him away, when he was gone I looked over to my bed. The commander probably left earlier in the morning, she was always the first one to be up, well, except for Joker maybe, but he gave me the impression that he didn't sleep at all. It took about an hour to get my armor on and to eat breakfast, I was still a bit grumpy at my rude awakening but soon forgot about it when I saw the commander smiling brightly at the galaxy map, she was getting better at smiling.

We had landed on some isolated planet with a lot of ice, even inside of the Mako we were shivering. It was silent for a long time, excluding the noises the Mako made as the commander drove haphazardly over the icy landscape. "What are we doing on this mission exactly?" I asked, the commander smiled and sad "We're looking for information on a ship that has been taken by pirates. For that information we are visiting a good friend of mine.". I felt the corner of my mouth twitch at her sweet smile. The mission was simple and the commander did most of the work, gathering information by chatting with her friend. Alenko had found himself useful in exploring the big library we were at. I just sat on a chair waiting for everyone to be done, I wondered why the commander had even asked me to go with them, she seemed to be perfectly capable of handling this mission on her own.

Back at the ship I remembered that the Mako needed repairing and I informed Shepard of this, she arranged for new part to be brought in and said I would probably be able to work on it in about two weeks. We then all sat down at the table on the middle deck for dinner. There were some conversations going on, but I did not care much for them, I was content with eating and listening. Then the commander spoke to me "Vakarian, are you sensitive?" I was glad I had not been chewing, because I almost choked on my own spit from her words. I could see the lieutenant choking on his food and heard Ashley pat his back while she laughed. Wrex looked utterly amused, while Liara and Tali continued their conversation, ignoring the others. "E-excuse me?" I managed to say feeling very embarassed. "Your skin is made of some kind of metal, right? Is your skin still as sensitive as that of a human?" I calmed down a bit on her explanation and everyone continued talking. "It is, which is why turians still wear armor." I answered feeling less flustered, I began to think the commander created these moments on purpose. The commander let out a soft 'huh!' and we all continued eating.

After dinner the commander went up to me and said "can I experiment on your sensitivity?" I thought for a second and slowly nodded. The commander seemed very happy with this and led me to one of the med clinic's empty rooms. She proceeded to trails different limbs with two small pointy sticks, asking me if I felt one or two trails. She also explained she wanted to know a turian's sensitive places for the inevitable fight with Saren. I was relaxed, I always seemed to be relaxed when I was with the commander. After testing my body she moved closer to investigate my face. She sat opposite of me and felt with her hands, she trailed over the warpaint on my face with her fingers, her fingers were a bit rough, which was ofcourse expected from someone who had fought all her life. I found myself enjoying her little experiment, she trailed her fingers on my mandibles. As she did so they twitched to her touch. I looked at her face taking in the look of fascination on her face.

She then cupped the side of my jaw and asked " tell me, commander Vakarian, do turians kiss? " I was confused and said " I don't know what you mean by that.". She then leaned in on my neck and placed her mouth against me, the touch was soft and gentle. She then explained "When humans feel attracted to each other and they have a relationship, they press their mouths against each other like that." She smiled looking a bit embarassed for heving to explain this to me. Who knew the commander who could kill someone in cold blood and was capable of manipulating politicians, would be embarassed about such a small thing. I chuckled and answered "No, turians do not have soft mouths like humans do." She looked so different when she was not on a mission, she seemed so free and relaxed. Then she asked "What do male turians find attractive?" I reached out to trail my finger on her soft skin and said "Most turians like it when a woman's waist is smaller than her hips and ehm, bust. Most turians also find the fringe on females very attractive." She then said "Then let me change the question, what do you find attractive?" I felt warmth spread through my body at her innocent words. "I think women with a strong personality are attractive, I also find a naturally tanned skin attractive. And I like long dark brown hair, dark eyes with long eyelashes, I like-" I was cut off when she embraced me tightly. I sighed at the gesture and embraced her back, for once she just stayed silent and we savored the moment.

When we broke apart she placed another kiss on my crest and told me about her plans on investigating a space ship owned by pirates soon, I agreed to go with her and we both went our own way. The rest of the day it felt as if my mood couldn't get any better, I discussed some technical things with Tali and had a short conversation with Wrex. Then Ashley came up to me while I had been working out some details about the new parts that would soon arrive. "Hey Garrus, can I ask you something?" Not bothering to look up I said "Sure.". Ashley then asked me "Are you and the commander in a relationship?" When she said that it suddenly struck me that Shepard and I hadn't actually confirmed that. "Well, I don't really know. She seems to enjoy spending time with me, but she hasn't asked me to enter a relationship with her." I said. "Maybe you should ask her if she wants to be in a relationship with you, I'm sure Shepard would be pleasantly surprised if you ask her." Ashley said I told her I would consider it and went back to work, it would be good for the commander to have a nice surprise once in a while.

That evening in the showers I thought about what Ashley had said and decided I would do so after our mission. The warm water was soothing and reminded me of Shepard- no Deya's touch, I felt odd using the commanders first name, it seemed inapproperiate. Speaking of inapproperiate, my mind began to fill itself with images of Deya doing some more than inapproperiate things. I turned the shower cold and thought to myself, back when we were being educated about the human race their bodies hadn't seemed erotic in the slightest, but somehow the commander was more erotic to me than any turian I had ever met. Cooling my self down my arousal swiftly faded and I got out. That night I dreamt of her, not erotic though, just romantic.

The next day the whole crew was getting ready for the mission, the ship was very big so the commander had divided us over three teams the first team being Tali and Ashley the second Liara and Wrex and finally the commander, Kaiden and I. Team one was supposed to collect supplies and sabotage our way in, the second team would be out first and create a path by fighting off the pirates closeby. And our team would gather evidence and take out the boss behind the operation. The first half hour our team was waiting for a signal from Liara and Wrex, when we got the signal we left the ship together with Tali and Ashley who had to split up later to deactivate the security system. It took at least an hour to get to the main hall while fighting our way through enemies, when we arrived the boss behind all of the pirates fought with us for about half an hour. Just before he was killed the boss detonated bombs strewn about the main hall, causing some parts of the floor to collapse. I fell down and braced myself, I landed hard on a table and had to lay still for a few moments. Finally getting up I felt my whole back was bruised, and I winced when I realised it would hurt at every step. I looked around me and could not spot Shepard or Alenko, feeling panic slightly creeping up on me I took a few deep breaths and calmed myself. It is going to be fine, the commander can handle herself, even though her skin may be easily bruised. The thought of the commander being stuck brought me into action and I rushed out the door and checked every room on the level. The commander was nowhere to be found. Maybe she fell through this floor too, I rushed down the stairs and took out some pirates along the way. I then remembered that I had an earpiece for communication "Commander, this is Vakarian, do you copy?" I tried several times before giving up, my heart clenched at the thought of something bad having happened to the commander when my earpiece said "Vakarian, this is team one, do you copy?" I felt disappointed at hearing William's voice but answered"Williams, this is Vakarian. Have you heard from the commander?" I kept a walking pace as I opened every door on my way. "Good to hear you, Vakarian. We have not heard from the commander, what happened? We lost contact suddenly." She said, I answered "There were bombs placed in the main hall, we fell through on different locations." I then heard a piece of metal falling down and rushed towards it's sound. "Should we help looking for the commander?" Ashley asked, I said "Is Alenko with you all? I think I am getting closer to Shepards location, it would be better for you all to stay over there." I opened the door to the room, it was a large room with a long table and a lot of chairs. Pieces of the ceiling had fallen down and you could see the ceiling in the main hall, the main hall seemed to be collapsing as another piece of metal fell throughthe hole and made a loud metal 'clang!' As it hit the ground. There were no signs of Shepard when Ashley's voice entered my earpiece "Alenko is here, he has some minor injuries." Then Tali's voice interrupted "Vakarian, the ship is falling apart, get out of there!" I heard a loud crash right above me as she said this and I went back into the hall "Not before I find her.". I heard someone running in a side corridor and yelled "Shepard?" I was starting to panic, if it isn't her I might have to leave without her. "Garrus!" A voice replied, I immediately rushed over and Shepard rushed over to me, weexchanged smiles and quickly went up the stairs. Most of the remaining pirates had evacuated and the commander and I rushed to the main hall. The main hall was a mess, there were big holes in the floor and pieces of the ceiling crashed down.

The commander and I began jogging to the other side of the halk when I heard the sound of metal piercing flesh and just a few seconds later a loud thump. Startled I looked back and the world seemed to slow down, the commander was on the ground, abig piece of metal had pierced her left leg and there was lood forming around it. The commander seemed to need a few seconds to register what happened and then she screamed, she screamed and liquid began to form at her eyes. I rushed over feeling my heart clench so tightly it hurt. She then screamed "T-TAKE-" Then she had to gasp for air and frantically waved her hand at the piece of metal piercing her leg. I felt myself shaking and tried to pull the metal from her leg, but it had lodged itself into the flooring. I panicked even more and quickly contacted the crew "The commander, s-she has a piece of metal, don't move! A piece of m-metal in her leg!". The commander was now sobbing hysterically unable to calm her breathing from the pain. I took her hand and let her squeeze my hand painfully tight as I impatiently waited for a response. "What!? Shoot it off then!" I heard someone yell through the earpiece, not even trying to recognise the voice I yelled "What?! Her leg!?" I was panicking and began to feel dizzy from hyperventilating. "No you idiot! Shoot the piece of metal!? The ship is about to collapse hurry up!" Shaking I pulled my pistol from my back and shot at the piece of metal, the sound of the commander wailing fading to the background as another big piece of metal fell down. I shot again, and again and again. I finally broke the piece off and pulled the commander's leg off. I got up with the commander in my arms, she had blacked out from either bloodloss or not enough oxygen. I sprinted through the ship, pressing the commander tightly against myself. After what seemed like an eternity I finally reached the Normandy, I pushed past everyone and went straight to doctor Chakwas.I left the doctor to her work and went out, but while I was walking towards the stairs my vision became blurry and I collapsed on the floor.

I woke up feeling horrible, my back hurt like there was no tomorrow and I felt like someone had beaten the rest of my body to pulp. I opened my eyes, waiting for them to adjust to the bright light. I was in the doctor's clinic on board of the Normandy, I examined my body and found that there was a gash in my right shoulder, ofcourse it had been patched up and it was already healing, but that didn't take away the pain. Other than that I had no serious injuries for as far as I could tell, but my body hurt all over. Doctor Chakwas looked up from her book and went over to me "How do you feel?" She asked, if it wasn't for her being the one who had patched me up I would have scowled. But instead I said "About how you expect to feel when you fall through a floor and landing on a table." I then felt a throbbing ache overtaking my head, I groaned and the doctor said "Well, I guess you're doing reasonable then." I suddenly remembered what happened to the commander and began "But, where-" doctor Chakwas cut me off and said "She's alive, we're at the citadel she is in the hospital clinic inside." I felt my body relax and my eyes suddenly felt abnormally heavy.

When I woke up the second time the headache had disappeared and I felt a lot better, but in need of a shower. I got up from the bed, I looked down to see I was in fact wearing pants and headed for the showers with a towel I quickly grabbed from my room. As I stood in the warm streams of the shower I noted to myself that I needed to visit Deya when I was done. I was in the shower for half an hour thinking and relaxing. When I went through the ship I noticed most people had left for the Citadel already, I nodded to Joker and went out. Walking to the clinic I thought about how good it felt to stretch my legs again, even though there was still a numb pain in my shoulder and I felt kind of sore. I entered the clinic and waved at the doctor, not paying too much attention to her. I immediately went over to the bed Shepard was sitting up in, she was talking to Tali with Ashley standing next to her. When I approached Ashley said "We'll come back later, get well!" And she dragged Tali out with her flashing a smile at me. I sat down next to the bed she sat in and I felt guilty seeing her being stuck in a place like this, I waited for her to say something to me, but instead she cupped my face with her left hand and pulled me in to place a kiss on my forehead. She then pulled back and smiled at me "Thank you." She said. I stood up and embraced her, wanting to show her that I would never let go, I would never leave her behind. She hugged me back and rubbed small circles on my back with her hand.

We talked for an hour about interesting and uninteresting subjects alike, then it was time for her to rest and I went back to the ship. "Vakarian." I heard Alenko say as soon as I entered the ship, I walked over to him "yes?" he looked guilty and said "Thank you for saving the commander. You did something I could not and you two deserve to be happy." This surprised me and I smiled at him "Thank you lieutenant." I said and walked on. 


	3. Chapter 3

This is a story about my f!shepard and Garrus in the first mass effect game. I have not played the other two games yet, so I appologise in advance if Garrus is ooc. This takes place before the Virmire mision and my Shepard is generally paragon. I do not own any of Mass Effect's character's that honor belongs to Bioware. Rated m for sexual content later on. If I don't mention where they are, the story mostly takes place in the Normandy. This chapter will contain sexual content, be warned. I don't write sex scenes that often (this is my second attempt) so please be warned for that as well. And if something doesn't make sense in the story, say a metaphore, it is because english is not my first language, sorry.

After about a month my wounds had completely healed and Shepard was also almost fully healed, I decided to find out more about human culture and had looked up all different sorts of articles. When I had first heard about human's they were just as alien to me as I was to them, but after meeting the commander my feelings changed. It was obvious that some actions were just impossible for a turian and human to work, like the way human's 'kiss' each other, I do not have lips, but that didn't stop me from wondering what it would be like. It was very obvious to the crew that the commander and I felt for eachother and I had told the commander so just a week ago, she had been really happy and kissed my forehead, at that moment I had felt in my heart that I truly loved her.

I was walking around the ship when I heard the commander talking, deciding to join the conversation I went towards the comm room. Then I heard Joker ask the commander "So you are in a relationship with the turian?" I carefully looked around the corner and saw the both of them sitting down and chatting. "Yes, we have felt this attraction for a long time. Why?" The commander answered. "It's just that it probably isn't easy to have an interspecies relationship, are you sure you want to start this now? We are on a mission to get Saren and there is a big risk involved with that, he could die, you would become depressed or you might even sacrifice yourself for him." The commander thought about his words and answered "I know what I am getting into Joker and I thank you for your concerns, but if I have to fight alongside anyone it would be him. There is indeed a chance that one of us does not make it and I am prepared to make sacrifices, that I am in a relationship does not change my status as commander and the responseability that comes with it." I felt my heart beat faster at her words and my mandibles flared. I then left their conversation and got some work done.

Shepard p.o.v.  
After Garrus told me he wanted to be in a relationship the crew got very curious and sometimes very... bold with the questions they asked and so I got in this situation: In the middle of the night Joker decided that Ashley, Kaiden, himself and I would come together so I could answer some of their questions. Ofcourse I had refused at the beginning, but they would not stop asking about it, in the end I accepted because they had threatened to ask Garrus if I didn't want to answer their questions. Now we were sitting in the comm room, the four of us, and I had to answer their questions, great. The first to ask was Kaiden "Commander, I need to know who made the first move in your relationship." I shrugged and answered "Stop being so formal Kaiden, we are friends right now, not commander and lieutenant." I heard Joker chuckle and continued "To answer your question though, I would say Garrus made the first move, he misunderstood the meaning of a smile or something like that and came to the ridiculous idea of challenging me to a fight, ofcourse I agreed." Kaiden seemed to slump a bit but kept a straight face and nodded. "Will you let everyone know you and Garrus are in a relationship?" Ashley excitedly asked. "I figure that they will find out no matter what, so, yes." I said, honestly I was a bit worried about the reaction to our relationship. Not many humans had an interspecies relationship and it would probably not be welcomed by most.

Joker kept silent as if he was planning on some questions, and knowing him he would ask some outrageous ones. "What do you find attractive about Garrus? I mean, he looks almost nothing like a human." Kaiden asked, he was looking a bit sour, I replied "It's not his appearance that I think is most attractive, it's more how he and I just seem to fit together, we have the same mindset, but we are also both able to look at something from a different perspective." I had feared that the questions would have been worse, but up until now it all seemed fine. Until Joker opened his mouth "Deya, have you always been attracted to aliens, or only turians?" I sughed and answered "No, as I said before it was mostly his personality." Joker chuckled again and said "Yeah, mostly.". Then Ashley came with a question "What do turians look like without clothes anyway?" I felt a slight blush rise up to my cheeks before I could supress it and quickly answered "Why don't you just look it up?". Then Joker said "EDI, open extranet interface." I had walked right into his trap.

Joker then typed in 'turian anatomy', I was actually curious myself, seeing as I never got him pantless. I blushed at the thought. Some images showed up of turians with no clothes, they weren't exactly shocking, honestly you couldn't see anything that even looked like reproductive organs. I heard a 'huh' escape from Kaiden's mouth and Ashley turned to me "But, I don't even see genitals." I was no wiser, but I had some theories which I would not discuss with them ofcourse. Joker then said "Then how do you have sex with him?" Just as I thought I didn't need to be embarassed anymore the idiot just had to say something. "I haven't had sex with him, yet." I immediately regretted saying yet as Kaiden seemed to react immediately with his question "Yet!?". In all of my career there was not a moment I had wanted to disappear into the ground as much as I did right now. At that moment the door to the comm room opened and, ofcourse the person to walk in had to be the person we were talking about. "What are you all doi-" he looked up at the window still open and his mandables flared.

I think that we all looked like deer in the headlights as he realised what was going on, waiting for him to say something I sat still. He walked up to me, gave me a 'let's get out of here' look and pulled me with him, leaving the others behind. We went to his room and at first I thought he was mad at me, but when we entered his room he began laughing loudly. Confused I just stood there and waited for him to finish. He then straightened up and looked at me with an amused look on his face. "You know, you could have just asked." He said with amusement clear in his voice. I blushed and stammered "I wasn't sure you what you would say... or think, I mean, maybe you didn't even plan t-to, you know..." I felt super embarassed right now. Garrus then teasingly asked "Hmm, no I don't know what you could possibly mean... Care tk explain?" I couldn't help but smile at his tone and, feeling confident now, I stepped closer so our bodies were only millimeters apart. Then I seductively said "I was talking about... sex."

Garrus p.o.v.  
It sounded so erotic when she said it, when she gave me that look I could feel my body heat up. "Well, maybe I was planning to have... sex, with you." I said as I pulled her so close we were standing directly against eachother. She kissed my neck and I closed my eyes letting out a satisfied sigh. She then said "I believe I explored your body last time, maybe you want to return the favour?" At her words I felt excitement coursing through me and she smiled at me. I gently removed her clothes and layed her down on my bed. She was still wearing underclothes, but even with those her body was beautifully revealed. I had seen naked humans before, on the extranet, but she, she was different, she was the most perfect human, no being in this entire galaxy and beyond. I lightly traced my talons over her very sensitive skin making her shiver, I traced her collarbones, her sides, her arms, her legs and I traced over the middle of her stomach to that odd little hole in the middle of it. I then tried to remove the uppernpart of her underclothes, which was oddly connected and she ended up doing it herself giggling at my attempts. She was so different from a turian, though I had never been with anyone in my life, the turian anatomy was understandable to me. Her body though, it had to be explored, I decided to ask her "What are these for?" I asked as I pointed to her chest.

She laughed lightly and said "Those are breasts, humans feed their offspring milk from them when they are young." I nodded and interestedly placed my hand over one of them making her gasp in pleasure, the breast was just a little bit fuller than my hand could hold and it was even softer than the rest of her body. Instinctively I began massaging them, feeling the softness. Deya moaned and seemed very pleased with what I was doing. I felt aroused, but knew that without the proper information we should not try to... engage in any, too dangerous acts. We would have to look something up later. Right now I focused on her, and I tried softly pinching her nipple, she let out a loud moan and arched her back so her hips made contact with my leg, which was placed in between them. One hand kept massaging her breast while I moved my upper body more downward to take off the remaining underclothing. It revealed a mound, it was relatable to what female turians had and I hoped it had the same purpose. Her mound looked very vulnerable, so I decided against using my clawed fingers and used my tongue instead. As I slowly swiped my tongue through her fold she let out the most delicious moan, causing me to continue with even more enthusiasm.

I licked over a particular small bud above her opening and she bucked her his upward, I kept stimulating her being rewarded by her moans each time. Her taste was like nothing I had tasted before, but I didn't mind it, I just hoped it wasn't poisonous to me. Even if it was, at this moment I was willing to risk it. I let my tongue explore the inside of her hole and felt her walls move all around, I felt a great need to be inside her, but the thought of hurting her because of my own impatience was enough to keep me at bay. I was still massaging her breast with my left hand and with my right hand I carefully pressed one finger against the sensitive bundle of nerves. Her muscles seemed to all tighten up at once and then she relaxed, taking this as a sign she had climaxed I layed down on my back beside her, feeling an overwhelming sense of accomplishment, her breathing was heavy and the room felt warm as she said "T-that was better than I could have ever hoped Garrus, I love you."

Shepard p.o.v.  
As I was still high on my orgasm, I remembered that Garrus must be itching for release too. I then sat up, put on my panties and faced Garrus, who was looking up to me from his relaxed layed down position. "I imagine you want some release too, let me help." I said as he sat up as well. "If you're tired you can go to sleep, I can take care of myself." He said, but I wasn't going to let this opportunity slide. "No, I want to and I know you want it too. I can rest later." I pushed on, his mandables twicthed again proving that I had been right. I placed myself on his lap and removed his shirt, while doing this I said "I don't plan to go all the way before we find out what we can and can't do." He seemed to relax, proving that he had been thinking about it too. Sometimes it just felt as if we were of the same mind, cautious, but not afraid of adventure, able to follow, but also to lead. The likenesses between us two were what made me fall in love with him, he thought as I did and I was glad he did so. I admired his chest, letting my hand run over it, it was smooth, it felt kind of hard, like a thin layer of metal, but also smoother than I would've thought.

I then removed his pants requiring some of his assistance and admired his body for a few seconds. I then settled myself between his legs, resting my elbows on them and asked "How do your repdroductive organs work?" I felt no embarassment but also surprised, because Deya was still with me. I had expected her to have left earlier in the morning, but she was still here. I began to wonder, does she value me more than her job? On one side it would make me very happy but on the other side it was, worrisome, I don't want her to risk failing the mission for me... but then again, I would do the same for her. That feeling of worry made me embrace her tightly for a second, she was here in my arms, she will do the right thing when the time is there. She let out a soft yawn and turned over to me, letting one arm slip over my waist. She gave me a tired smile and placed a kiss in the nape of my neck, I had received numerous kisses from her in the time that we were together, but never once had I done something back to show that I also loved her. Then I just softly pressed my forehead against hers, feeling that it would be equal. She asked "What was that for?" With a soft smile on her even softer lips. "In return for your kiss." I simply said, knowing that she would understand the thought behind it.

It was as if only we existed right now, as if there were no problems, no stress, just the warm embrace we shared. And the loud banging on my metal door as Wrex yelled "Dammit Vakarian, get the commander out of your bed we need her right now. I've waited for you two wake up for over an hour, get your asses out here." If I hadn't known Wrex I would've thought that he was actually angry, but there was a hint of smug amusement in his voice. Deya sighed and gave me a reassuring smile as she got up and yelled "Yeah, yeah, we'll be over in half an hour. And I can almost hear you grinning in the other side of the door, get a move on!" Ofcourse she wasn't mad either, it was kind of how we treated eachother in this ship. She was already putting on her uniform, I stayed in bed until she was finished just to see as much of her beauty as I could. She then gave me a thumbs up and left my room, I quickly got up, not willing to wait for the loneliness to kick in and got on my uniform. Before eating I had to take a shower, if the noise yesterday wasn't enough then our smell would certainly give it away. After the nice shower Deya and I quickly ate a meal together, since we were late the others were already done, and we went to the comm room. Most people were there, as we sat down I scanned the others to see what they were thinking, Wrex had a smug smile, Ashley looked very happy, Kaiden had a bit of a frown going on and Tali was looking very rested. After Liara rushedly joined us we talked about how to find Saren and what the best plan of attack would be. Then Joker's voice spoke "Commander, incomming call from the council." I looked over to her, she shrugged and said to Joker "What about?" To which Joker replied "Something about a party, I don't know, want me to connect them?". "Yes please." The commander said, you could hear Joker snickering and he said "Well, I guess Vakarian's not the only one who can ask nicely." The commander's face lit up and my body tensed up, she was about to reply when the council came through. The commander hastily got up and stood in front of them, greeting them. "Hello, commander Shepard." The asari council member said, while the turian council member merely looked at her and the salarian raised his hand in greeting. "You must wonder about the nature of this call, I will get right to business. We call you for a ceremony for your recently acquired spectre status." The commander looked confused "If I may ask, why?" She said. The turian council member said "Because we decided on it, the media wants to know about the first human spectre." The commander raised an eyebrow but kept silent at the irritated tone the turian had, which gave away he didn't choose for it to be so.

Most of the important people from the crew were invited, plus our squad. Wewere told there would be sorts of important people and to leave a good impression, weapons were restricted. With one glance at the commander I could tell that she was going to take weapons anyway. We were told to dress appropriately, they specifically told the commander not to come in armor and sent further data about the event to EDI. Ashley and Liara were pretty excited for the event and quickly took the commander and Tali with them to make plans. The males were left, and it seemed that most of us weren't too excited about going, we talked about it for some time and then went seperate ways. When I was alone and went back to work I felt slightly worried for the ceremony and the 'party' afterwards, I would need to speak to Deya about our relationship and if she wanted it to be public or not. I was worried about what people from both races would think if the commander, an important person to everyone, announced she was in a relationship with a turian. Even worse a turian from her crew, they could see me as a distraction and strip her of her specter-rights. I was sure the commander would not care for their opinion and neither do I, but I do care about what happens to her and we would definitly talk about it soon.

Shepard p.o.v.  
"You know, I've never been to a ceremony like this, back on the flotilla there would only be a small gathering when a new member is assigned for a crew." Tali excitedly said, it was very sweet to see her look forward to this, her race was not exactly used to this much wealth and events of this scale. "I am excited to see which important people will be there, business people or politicians or ambassadors." Naturally Liara was interested in that, she was a researcher after all, maybe this would give her the chance to speak up about her theories and research. "I just hope to get out alive and well." I said, wishing I felt the same excitement the others felt. Instead ai only dreaded what was to come, they would ask questions and want me to say somethjng inspiring for everyone out there. A crew is one responsibility, I don't need the responsibility of media publicity on me as well. "Hey, don't worry so much, it's going to be just like back when I was with my sisters. We can have a girls night out!" Ashley was probably the most excited about the afterparty, but seeing as this was a closed event and one full of media at that I don't think it will be much of a party. But not wanting to sour the mood I said "You're right, after the ceremony we'll have some fun." My smile not completely fake, it was different from a combat mission and a bit of variety can't hurt.

Then it was time to pick outfits, I had to say it was fun to spend time as a group of friends instead of colleage's. We started with Tali's outfit, since she had to wear her suit underneath the formal clothes. We eventually went with an indigo wrap dress that was fastened in the back of her neck, crossed over her breasts and went back around to form a skirt that was short in the front and long in the back, the dress matched her usual headdress in color and pattern. Liara chose a lightgrey skintight dress that came down to just above her knees with a high collar and darker grey stripes to accentuate her curves over it she wore a long coat from the same material the same color as the stripes on her dress. The coat came to hang just above the floor and had a round opening so you could see her back, the coat could be taken off for the party and was formal enough for the ceremony. Ashley then decided it was my turn and went to grab something from her closet, but I interrupted her and said I already had something. First she looked a bit disappointed but when I showed her the dress she was happy again, it was a black dress reaching the middle of my thighs and it was almost skintight, the upper part was held up by thin straps crossing at my back and with a bit of a cleavage at the front. The cleavage was not too large, it was modest and appropriate for the ceremony. The side had a red line with one thinner white line on each side of the red line with the N7 logo at the bottom. Ashley approved of my choice and showed her own dress, a dark red dress reaching the floor with a split up to just above her knee the upper part was decorated with small black beads in a flower pattern.

Garrus p.o.v.  
By the time I saw Shepard again it was already almost nighttime, we were both tired, but sensing I had something to say she followed me to my room. "I'm sorry to bother you this late on the evening Deya, but I would like to know how and if you plan to tell the media you are in a relationship with me." I felt guilty for asking her to listen to me when she was obviously tired, but it had to be done. "I will tell them, but only if they ask about it." She said, rubbing in her eyes. "Wouldn't it be better if you just said it upfront? I don't think it will be easier if you have to answer that same question again and again to individual media interviewers." I protested, she looked in my eyes and let out a long sigh "I'm sorry Garrus, I'm very tired and the stress from the whole event will not put my mind at ease. I need some sleep now." Seeing her speaking only the truth I nodded in agreement and we both changed and went into bed. I whispered "I love you." But could sense she was already asleep, I put my arm around her and fell asleep too. 


	4. Chapter 4

This is a story about my f!shepard and Garrus in the first mass effect game. The story describes the Virmire mission in this chapter so beware! My Shepard is generally paragon. I do not own any of Mass Effect's character's that honor belongs to Bioware. Rated m for sexual content later on. If I don't mention where they are, the story mostly takes place in the Normandy. And if something doesn't make sense in the story, say a metaphore, it is because english is not my first language, sorry. I have played the second game now and will probably start making subtle references to it, they aren't big enough to be considered spoilers though.

The next morning she gently shook me awake, I opened my eyes and smiled sleepily at her. She then went out and I was left to wake up on my own, I dressed myself and sat down for breakfast with everyone. "I'm glad I actually got to sleep tonight, yesterday was just too noisy." Ashley exclaimed with a smug grin on her face. She made eyecontact with Joker and he said "I agree, but from what I've heard you don't mind some noise when you try to sleep, Tali?" Tali then began explaining to Joker about the flotilla and the grin on his face faded. Content, I continued eating and listening to the others discuss their day-to-day business. When most of us were finished the commander announced that the ceremony for her would be in two days, everyone then began talking about how they were excited and the commander and I left.

"I see your point in telling the media beforehand, but what would be the best way to tell them?" Deya said as we were alone by my workbench, I thought and said "You could just formally announce you are now in a relationship to everyone, no matter what you do, there will always be someone who is unhappy. Don't try to please everyone.". She smiled and said "Well, maybe I should just kiss you on stage then. That would certainly please you." I laughed and went through her dark brown hair with my hand. "I'll figure something out. How are those new parts on the Mako looking by the way?" She said, I began explaining and even though she wouldn't understand half of it, she still listened. This was the reason I loved her, one of many actually, but she understands me and that's what makes her so special and very important to me.

The next day and a half flew past us, the ceremony would be in two hours. We had just arrived on the Citadel, the ceremony was going to be held at the council's meeting spot. The afterparty was going to be in a penthouse not too far away, the afterparty would be mostly to keep the younger guest's attention, but I think Shepard was looking forward to it. I can't blame her, when you fight so much it's nice to take some time to have fun with your crew, no, friends. For the ceremony I just wore simple but formal light armor, I don't like the way normal clothes make younlook so fragile, I was dressed mostly in black with the N7 logo on the right side of my collar. The ceremony took about fortyfive minutes in which they did practically nothing but talk and give the commander a pin, during the talk I had plenty of time to look around and noticed that Wrex was still carrying his weapon, the security was probably scared into allowing it in. I was pretty sure Shepard had a gun somewhere on her, even if they took that from her, she would have her biotics. I ofcourse also carried a gun, just well hidden, you never know what kind of trouble we get into next. As I looked around I saw a salarian doctor that I had seen before, Mordin Solus, I had heard about him working in the Omega station. The others didn't seem very interesting though, except for that one annoying human that had tried to make Shepard look bad on live tv, dreadful woman.

When the boring part was over the commander began her speech "Most of you have seen the political struggle against Saren, but have you seen the military struggle? We lose lives everyday, from all species and races, this is no longer the act of a human hating spectre, this is the work of something bigger and I'll find out who." It was inspiring to me, probably something that was going to be ingored or criticized by others. "I have lost many friends on my journey and I haven't even reached the midway point, but I know that it will be worth it for in the end I may have lost those dear to me, but I have also gained. I hereby publicly announce that I, commander Shepard will be pursueing a relationship with former c-sec officer and luitenant Garrus Vakarian. I am aware that this announcement will result in controversy, but I would rather tell this myself than for it to get out via the media. If there are some questions that are left unanswered, please do ask them and I will try to answer them without giving away any restricted information. Thank you." She spoke , she then descended from the stairs and was bombarded with questions until the council quickly asked for attention. "The commander will answer your questions when we are done, we have sent all of you the details about the afterparty." The council said. Immediately after the commander was once again bombarded with questions, I tried to get to her through the crowd, but when the media began asking questions to me too I quickly retreated, waiting for the press to leave.

It took twenty minutes for Shepard to shake them off and find me, she looked tired and a bit annoyed. "Those bastards, I try to give them a formal announcement and they ask questions like 'Do you have a turian fetish?' And 'What role do you play in your sexual relationship?'. I forgot how nosey the press can be, when you're not in a ship they follow you everywhere." I laughed and pulled her in for an embrace "Don't worry so much about them, they don't matter." She sighed and leaned against me, resting her head on my shoulder. "HEY! You guys coming or not?" Ashley yelled from the other end of the hallway.

The party was a bit more than I would've thought, there were people everywhere around the penthouse and the music was so loud I could almost not hear anything that was going on. The commander went to drink something with Ashley and the others while I just sat down with the male crew members.

Shepard p.o.v.  
"It's been some time since I have been to a party, I don't remember them being so loud." I complained, parties weren't really for me. I prefer to hang out with my friends and just them, not all these people who don't even care about my wellbeing. But I have to admit, if my friends are having fun I won't abandon them. "Don't think so much, just let go." Ashley said as she danced, Tali was right there with her, though she danced quite different from a human. Liara sat next to me, sipping from her drink and taking in the room. I decided that if I wanted to even have a little bit of fun I would need to drink, so I excused myself to get some. On my way to the small bar where they served the drinks I smiled at Garrus, waving at him, I think he smiled back, though it's hard to say when he doesn't really have lips.

I took three drinks, not caring about what others thought. When I sat back down Ashley commented "Wow Shepard, you really want to have some fun, don't you?" I shrugged and downed my first drink, I almost coughed it back up, it had been some time since I last had a drink. But when the alcohol became effective I felt myself get very giddy and started dancing with Tali and Ashley, surprisingly I didn't even feel stupid while dancing. "Everyone needs to have some fun now and then." I said to Ashley, to which she raised her glass. After the second drink I began to wonder how much alcohol these drinks held, not caring I continued dancing. "Hey Deya, when was the last time you blew off some steam, you're dancing like crazy!" Williams yelled over the music that had become even louder. I began giggling and yelled back "Just a week ago, with Garrus. That's how I relieve my stress!" Williams laughed loudly and replied "Well, I should be blowing off some steam too then, it's been some time!". I then sat down to rest for a bit and saw that Liara had a slight blush from the alcohol, I smiled at her and said "Why don't you join our dancing? I heard Asari are real good dancers!" I then downed my third drink, even though that was probably not wise. Unexpectedly she replied "Yeah, I have some of those skills, let's show 'em off." I was a bit taken aback but laughed anyway. I suspected the Asari downed more than a few drinks the way she was dancing you would think this was Chora's Den.

Garrus p.o.v.  
"Excuse me, Vakarian. Need to speak with you. In private, follow me please." Doctor Solus said to me, I got up and followed him there wasn't much to do anyway. "Yes, what do you need from me?" I asked as we stood outside the appartment. "Need to inform you about... interspecies relationships. Thought it might be helpful." The doctor said, a hint of a smirk on his calm and collected face. I tensed up a bit, he could help us, he probably knows a lot about this stuff. "Yes it might be very helpful." I said, feeling embarassed. "Right, you need to know about the dangers of interspecies intercourse." Solus said, he then taught me a lot of things for half an hour. He then said he had to go, but sent me some data to answer any questions, the data included videos... I felt very embarassed and definitly not in the mood to get back in there with the guys, I decided to stay outside. I sat for some time and just looked over the inside of the Citadel, very pretty, tiny lights seemingly floating along the bridges and paths beneath me.

I felt someone tap my shoulder and turned around, it was Shepard, she looked flushed and a bit unstable. "Garrus, I love you." She said as she embraced me and sighed contently when my arms wrapped around her soft frame. "I love you too." I replied, still finding it an odd thing to say. After some time embracing I noticed she had fallen asleep, she was slumped against me and made soft breathing noises. I carried her back to the shop informing the others of where we were. As I lay her down in her bed she looked so peaceful and content, I softly put my forehead against hers and crawled into the bed, letting her wrap her arms around me as we slept.

Very early in the morning I woke up feeling abnormally warm, there was also a hellish pain in my stomach. I sat up, immediately regretting it, feeling a wave of pain hit me. I looked at my stomach, but there were no wounds. The room felt like it was spinning and the warmth was making it hard to think straight. What did I do yesterday? The ceremony. Did I eat something wrong? No, I don't remember eating anything. I groaned a bit as the wave of pain hit me again, I tried to think. Have I done anything unusual the last few days? No... well maybe... damnit. I would slap my hand against my forehead if I would have the strength. Ofcourse it was because of the, uhm, intercourse with Shepard. I was such an idiot, how could I ever forget the basic rules of going to outerspace and being in contact with aliens? Don't ingest anything if you are not sure of it's effect on your body. I was so lost in the moment that I... fuck, the pain in my stomach getting worse by the minute. I need to get to the doctor, I shouldn't wake Deya. I stood up, feeling the room spin around me and the urge to throw up. Trying to set another step I lost balance and landed against the wall, resulting in a loud 'thunk!'. Ofcourse Shepard was up in a minute to see what was going on. She quickly stood up from the bed, then seemed to wobble a bit and examined the room. When her eyes found me leaning against the wall, probably looking very ill, she rushed over and supported my arm. "Garrus, what's wrong!?" She said, unable to hide the fear in her voice. "J-just get me to the doctor." I answered, hating that I wasn't able to comfort her. She then quickly threw on a shirt and guided me through the halls, following my orders as I would normally follow hers. By the time we fovision was blurry arry and I passed out.

The next time I woke up was more pleasant. I lay in a white bed in the medical bay on the Normandy, it seemed to be late afternoon, since the doctor wasn't here, but the lights were on. I lay still waiting for the doctor to return and hear if my suspisions were correct. Doctor Chakwas walked in "Ah, you're up. I gave you a temporary shot to clear out your system, how do you feel?" She asked. "A lot better, but also kind of stupid for the mistake I made." I answered feeling a bit uncomfortable talking about this. "Well, you're still alive and I trust you not to make the same mistake twice. Though you might want to get a more permanent shot at the hospital if you keep this up." The doctor said, taking my hint and not going into detail. I thanked the doctor and went to my room, catching some more sleep.

The next thing I know I was tightly embraced, startled, I opened my eyes to see the commander was the one embracing me. "What was wrong? I thought you were going to die." She said, I sat up as she sat next to me on my bed and said "I didn't take the neccesairy precautions when we... when we experimented." She looked at me with a worried look and held my hand as she said "Don't ever take that risk again. I will wait for you if you need me to, this is not worth dieing over.". I smiled at her and said "Thank you for your concern, I will take those precautions the next time we visit someplace with a hospital." She smiled back in her human way and asked "Do you know how we're going to make this work?" I then remembered my talk with dr. Solus. "Actually, at the party I was approached by a salarian doctor, dr. Solus, and he said he would send me data." I said, she had a mischievous smile on her face as she asked "What kind of data?" I looked away from her large brown eyes and coughed "Uh, well, a few books." I coughed again "And videos." I quietly added. She burst out in laughter and kissed my forehead "I enjoy it when you're so embarassed, sorry, I still love you!" I smiled at her words and felt my nervousness sink away, but then she just had to add "We should watch one of them together." I almost choked on my own spit and looked at her dumbfounded. "Do humans usually do that?" I asked her, she answered "I don't know, maybe some of them." I then came up with a question "Were you ever in a relationship before?" The commander seemed to be caught offguard with my question. "No, actually, I have not." This struck me as a bit odd, since she was certainly attractive, to me at least, maybe not to humans. But then again, maybe she was very selective, the thought made me feel proud of her choosing for me.

"Then did you ever, you know, go all the way?" I asked, I wasn't sure how normal one time flings were for them. "No. I did try some things out when I was still in the early years of my Alliance training." She said, a faint blush forming on her cheeks. "I actually expected someone like you to have done it before." Admitted to her. "I guess I'll take that as a compliment. Have you?" She smiled at me. I thought back, once when I was also still in the militairy. "Yes, once in the millitairy. We came to a tie at a match and ended up rematching in my room, my reach versus her flexibility." I said and she said "I envy her, she took your first. In human culture the first time having intercourse can be very important, though it is different for every individual, it is seen as an important event you don't just share with anyone." That surprised me, intercourse itself was ofcourse meant as an intimate way of showing your affection in my culture, but we didn't regard the first time as special. "It isn't like that in turian culture, but if that is true then wouldn't you want to experience it with one of your own species?" I asked, genuinely worried. What if I ruined her first experience, I was no stranger to the concept, but practically I had almost no experience myself. She then leaned in and placed a soft hand on my jaw, which I began recognizing it as a comforting gesture, and she said "Garrus Vakarian, if there is anyone in this universe I would want to share my first experience with, it is you." I let out a sigh and pressed my forhead against hers, feeling her press back. "Plus, I would like to prove that I am way more flexible than your first." She added smiling mischeavously. This flooded my mind with all kinds of inapproperiate images, but, remembering that I needed to get a more permanent allergy shot, I smiled back and watched her as she left me to do my work. Which, ofcourse, was exactly where my mind was right now.

In the next few days I thought about where all of this was going, the commander and I. Everyday we came closer to finding Saren and everyday we had to accept the fact that we were most likely not going to make it. I had gotten an injection that would prevent me from getting sick, but the fact that the commander was not immortal and would thus have a big chance of dieing made me feel sick anyway. I sometimes wondered if it would have been better if she had gone with Alenko, our relationship, as good as it sometimes felt, was a hard one. Keeping a relationship between two different species was tireing, different cultures and morals were sometimes hard to understand. But the commander didn't give up, so I wouldn't either. I was analyzing some data when the commander called the crew to the comm room.

"We found Saren's base. A group of the salarian special tasks group has discovered it, but is unable to proceed or turn back. We need to go there and find Saren." The commander said. Everyone had mixed expressions, but none of them were fear. "I won't lie to you, this mission will not be easy, but I want you all to know that I believe we can make it out of there." She said and everyone nodded in agreement. "So, who will you take with you to clear out the enemies on land, commander?" Alenko asked, he looked a bit worried. "I will be taking you and Garrus in the Mako." She answered with a confident smile. "Yes commander." Alenko just said. A part of me was excited to see how this mission would end, but I was also afraid, if it came down to it, would I be able to let the commander go when the succes of the mission was on the line? I nodded in agreement and we all went back to our own spaces, waiting for the ship to arrive in Virmire.

The commander knocked on my door, I let her in. She sat down next to me on my couch and said "We will arrive at Virmire in less than an hour." She looked worried, as if something was bothering her. "Garrus, if the mission goes wrong, will you let me do what I have to?" She asked, her voice filled with emotion. I felt my heart sink as I looked at her, she looked sad. I sighed deeply and let my hand go through her hair "If you ask that of me, I will." I answered, though I was not certain if I would actually be able to do it. "Thank you." She said as she laid her head down onto my lap, I brushed through her hair with my fingers giving her some peace before the mission.

We landed on Virmire shortly after. The first part of the mission was fairly easy, shoot some geth, drive around, open some passages. Then we arrived at the building, it was a very big building and a group of salarians stood near it. The commander talked to the salarian in commando and he explained that Saren was breeding Krogan in there, enslaving them and using them for an army. These krogan were tankbred and thus were not like real krogan, there were born and trained to fight, to kill. But Wrex didn't seem to understand that, all he heard was a cure to the genophage. The commander tried to explain that she didn't have a choice in the matter, but the krogan just stomped off. Then the commander talked with Alenko and Williams, after which she approached Wrex. Wrex was shooting at the water and I felt concerned for the commander, just to be sure I stayed only a few metres behind them. The commander explained to Wrex why she could not leave this facility unharmed, and Wrex pulled out a gun. I felt my hand unconsciously rest on my own as the commander only explained further. In the end she seemed to be able to convince him that these krogan were nothing like the real ones, Wrex seemed to accept it and we spoke to the salarian commander.

The plan was to blow up the facility with a nuclear bomb, we spoke about the risks and concluded that our team would be a shadow team. Alenko led the second team which, together with the salarians, attacked from the front. Our team disabled the defences from inside out so Joker could arrive with the nuclear bomb. The fight was not easy and we soon realised that something bigger than Saren was at work. We then met Sovereign, an ancient reaper, who told us about his plans and how this cycle had been around for longer than we could ever imagine. The reapers were the ones to create the citadel, they were also the ones to wipe out the protheans and the many other races before them. Then Sovereign left and we had to continue to blow this place up. As we fought through, we finally reached a place where Joker could land, then Alenko said through our earpieces that his team was stuck in one of the towers, surrounded by enemies. We fought our way towards the tower, but then heard that Ashley was being overrun by geth, forcing the commander to choose. After her punching a metal crate, in frustration she decided to get back to Ashley. On her way back she apologised to Kaiden, she had tears in her eyes, but she fought on. The bomb was planted and everyone got into the Normandy, Jeff then got us away as fast as possible and we could see the explosion. The commander appeared composed, but I knew she wasn't.

Then the crew came together and we went over some of the events. When everyone left I took the commander into my arms, letting her spill her tears, on the outside she was a hard and strict woman, but she had feelings lke every other living being and right now I only wwnted to comfort her. We then went to her room and stayed together, sometimes talking, sometimes just enjoying eachothers company and holding eachother. Eventually we both fell asleep, forgetting our worries and not dreaming about anything.  



	5. Chapter 5

This is a story about my f!shepard and Garrus in the first mass effect game. The story describes the Virmire mission in this chapter so beware! My Shepard is generally paragon. I do not own any of Mass Effect's character's that honor belongs to Bioware. Rated m for sexual content later on. If I don't mention where they are, the story mostly takes place in the Normandy. And if something doesn't make sense in the story, say a metaphore, it is because english is not my first language, sorry. I have played the second game now and will probably start making subtle references to it, they aren't big enough to be considered spoilers though. Okay, so this is the final chapter for some undetermined time. Also, WARNING: this chapter contains spoilers for the ending of the first game and the beginning of the second game! There is also mention of depression, death, violence and all of that rated m stuff. Also some sexual content though.

The next day there was nothing to do, the crew felt down and it would be three days until arriving at the citadel. Most of us spent the day thinking about what happened, though some of us rather drowned it in drinking. The commander had decided to stay with me, we sat together under a soft blanket reading a book to keep our minds distracted. We didn't talk, it was too soon. We just read and leaned against eachother, I enjoyed not thinking too much, it was oddly relaxing. We spent almost the entire day like that, only getting out when we needed food. Occasionaly the commander would stop reading and pull me in for an embrace, I could tell that losing Kaiden was hard on her. We got through the day like that and fell asleep early at night.

The next day the commander looked better, she went around the ship to check up on everyone and make sure they had everything they needed. She worked on some things in my room and talked to me a few times. By the time we arrived at the Citadel everyone was feeling better and we all spent some time offshore, we visited friends or just hung around. The commander talked to the council and captain Anderson and came with the news that the Normandy was grounded. Everyone immediately protested ofcourse, but the council didn't change their mind, the galaxy was in danger that was coming closer everyday and the council forbid us to save it. So much for bringing protection to their people. I had damned the council many times, but this was just ridiculous. We all stayed in the citadel for a few days and the commander and I stayed in the same appartment.

"I feel stressed, Garrus. The council, Saren, Sovereign, the Geth, it's all stressing me out." Deya said, we were in our appartment with a beautiful view on the peridium at night. "Do you want to punch something? Because that's what I do when I feel stressed." I said, she looked into my eyes and with a seductive voice said "I know of something else that could relieve my stress." My mandibles flared and I hoped she meant what I thought she meant. "Now do you?" I said in a low voice, she then did that odd thing with her eyebrows and answered in the same seductive voice "Yes, though I will need your cooperation. Would you be so kind to remove my clothes?" I almost rushed over to her, but managed to keep a moderate pace "I would love to be so kind." I said, smiling.

When I stood close to her I let my hand go through her dark brown hair, admiring it. I stroked her cheek with my hand and looked into her dark brown eyes. When we were together like this there was no haste, I wanted to memorize every part of her body, every little spot and scar. She sighed and traced her finger over my mandible, they twitched under her touch and she smiled. With my thumb I followed her eyebrow, it was still an odd thing all of her hair, but it was mostly soft to the touch and it certainly looked good on her. Her lips then traced over my neck and I sighed in return. I took hold of the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, she was wearing one of those undergarments she referred to as a 'bra', I waited for her to remove it, for I wasn't exactly good at doing so. She removed her bra and I let my hands run over her soft breasts, those were also odd, but very attractive at the same time. She then rid me of my shirt and pressed herself against me, reaching up to kiss my forehead. She was not particularly small, just a tiny bit smaller than me. The feeling of her soft and squishy chest against my plates sent signals right to my nether regions. I pulled her against me and ran my hand, with now blunted talons, down her back. Little bumps appeared on her skin when I traced it, she was still so alien to me.

She then broke our embrace to get something, I let her go and followed her with my eyes, curious. "I spoke with doctor Chakwas, she did not have many suggestions and tips on our relationship, but she did tell me that chafing is a thing." I didn't fully understand what she meant by that and asked "What do you mean?" She then returned with a bottle containing some kind of oily substance. "Chafing means my wkin will get irritated, painful and red. It's because of your plates, they're not exactly soft so we need some oil to prevent chafing." I nodded and she approached with the bottle. She stepped out of her pants easily and I followed her lead, we went to our shared bed and she sat down "Can you apply this onto my skin?" She asked. I was very curious and agreed by nodding and taking the bottle, and she lowered her back onto the bed. I poured some of the content into my hand, some of it immediately running down my arm. I made sure both my hands were covered, while Deya removed her underwear, and began applying it onto her thighs. I massaged her thighs and she responded with a barely audible moan. When I was done with the front of her thighs she turned over, there was another bodypart completely different from turian anatomy. Two round orbs she would occasionally refer to as her 'ass' it was something, by my understanding, that humans found appealing. I massaged the back of her thighs and also her ass, it was soft, like her breasts, but also different. Because of Shepard I might not be able to fall in love with a turian ever again, her body was so soft and full of muscles, while a turian body was so hard and not supple at all. She then turned around again and smiled "So, are you more into my ass or my breasts?" She asked with a smug smile, I answered "I don't understand why you would make someone choose between those two." There was definetly no favourite for me, they were both great.

She then sat me down, with my back against the headboard and legs on the bed. She straddled me, giving me a full view of everything she had, succesfully stimulating my body even further. She kissed my forehead and lovingly cupped my face "I love you." She said with a soft smile on her face. I embraced her and whispered "I love you too." When I let go she waw still smiling and her hand reached downwards. She traced the lining of my lower plates and I growled in my throat. She then sat directlt above my member and teased it, letting it touch but never lowering herself onto me. I growled and pushed her over, I looked into her lust-filled eyes and entered her, causing us to moan in unison. She seemed to adjust rather quickly and let me know by rocking her hips against me causing me to gasp in surprise. I then grinned and began driving into her, she was tight, her walls moved around me in a way I would have never imagined. The sounds of the busy city drowned out and I could only hear her delicious moans filling the room. I kept the same pace, sometimes stimulating her by running a finger over her clit or licking her nipple. She then switched our positions so I was the one on bottom and she ground her hips against me, "Fuck, Garrus, I-I love-" she tried to say as she rocked against me she moaned loudly and tried again "F-fucking love you." I grinned and my hips bucked. She gasped, I seemed to have hit something that stimulated her even more. Confident, I began bucking my hips upward when she went downward, colliding our hips. I let out a loud moan and said "H-how are you so-" I gasped "S-so good at this? Damn!" I took hold of her hips and guided them against mine. "Because I'm with y-you, ofcourse!" She spoke breathlessly, we were both breathing heavily and I angled her hips. My member was now perfectly alligned with her spot and I kept a faster pace of bucking up and pushing her down. She bounced on top of me, no words coming out of her mouth, only moans. Her breasts bounced with her and that image of her, riding me was the most erotic image I would ever see.

I felt my climax approaching and fliped us both over one last time, and I pounded her as quick and hard as I could. I was probably waking the whole appartment building with my moans, but I didn't care, all that mattered was pleasuring us both. Suddenly she gasped loudly "G-garrus, are those-" she then let out another gasp "Are those fucking s-spikes!?" She moaned loudly this time and some saliva was now trailing down her chin. I grunted, feeling her walls tighten against me every time I pulled back "Y-yeah, they- Fuck! They are." She raked her nails over my back and almost yelled "F-feels fucking great!" I grinned. I was going to reach my climax very soon and said "I- I'm almost there. Y-you?" She pressed her nails into my back and said with an out of breath voice "Y-yes." I then felt her walls clench down on me and I couldn't hold it anymore. I came together with her, her walls were still contracting around me as I came.

I then rolled onto my back next to her and held her hand as we fell asleep together. I awoke the next morning, fully awake after a good night's rest. I felt very proud of myself from my prestations yesterday, I grinned and pulled the commander a little closer. I felt her awaken and let her turn to face me "Good morning Garrus." She said with a hoarse voice, she smiled "Good morning Deya." I said, going through her hair with my hand. "You wanna shower?" She asked before siting up in the bed. The covers fell to her side and revealed her beatiful body, I smiled and nodded. I followed her to the shower and we both sat underneath the shower, talking to eachother. "Yesterday was great, but was I more flexible?" She asked raising an eyebrow I chuckled and said "Oh, you are flexible in ways a turian could just never be." She smiled triumphantly and said "Well, I certainly do appreciate your reach, though I don't think we have fojnd the full potential of it yet." I grinned and jokingly said "If you keep giving me compliments I'll get arrogant!" She just laughed and responded with "You already are, no I'm kidding. But how come your genitals just suddenly got spikes yesterday?". If I could blush the way humans did, I would. But instead I explained "Well, if the recieving partner has not climaxed yet and the other partner is close, it will happen as a mechanism to equal the pleasure. Though I'm not sure if it feels as good for humans as it does for turians." She then looked a bit surprised and said with a grin "Well, it felt damn good. Do male turians have more stamina than male humans, or do you just have a lot of stamina?" I felt my heart swell with pride again and laughed. "I wouldn't know how long human males last, though I am fairly sure that I am very average." I said my grin never leaving my face. "Well the one person I have ever been with didn't last that long, but that might've been because we were younger. I hear human females just take way longer to reach their climax than human males. I'm glad you and I are about the same." She said, she placed a wet kiss on my already wet skin and I tried to hold onto the happiness I felt in that moment.

Later that day she came back from talking to Anderson, she explained that Anderson would distract Udina so that they could find the conduit and stop Saren and, more importantly, Sovereign. The crew was quickly assembled and we fled in the Normandy, as soon as we found the planet with the conduit located on it we dropped off. If we had more time I would have looked around more, there were prothean relics EVERYWHERE! But the constant shooting kept me from exploring the prothean culture further. Wave after wave after wave of geth swarmed around us, it seemed like an eternity before we finally made it inside the building that held the conduit. We almost raced through it in the Mako until we seemingly landed in a trap. We got out and found an old VI from the protheans, it informed us of the reapers, the protheans and how the citadel was designed as a giant trap. Shocked we also learned that the conduit would teleport us to the citadel. We hastily went on and bashed through even more waves of geth. Then we launched the mako right into the conduit, I had never thought I would ever experience anything like it, it felt as if we were not only travelling through space, but also through time. But before I could even wonder more about that, the mako came to a harsh crash inside the citadel.

Shepard, Wrex and I got out of the vehicle and started making our way to the council room. The citadel then closed itself and Sovereign managed to disable the weapons of the citadel and a few ships. Then Sovereign took place in the middle of the citadel, on the council tower. Because the citadel had folded itself shut we were walking up the side of the building, it felt as if we were only three against an army of geth. When we finally made it to the top Shepard confronted Saren. Saren tried to explain that if we surrendered to the reapers there would be a chance we survived. Shepard then brought in that we would let the reapers win, that we should stand up and fight! Somehow Saren saw what had happened to him, he had become a puppet to the reapers. Saren remembered what the commander had said in Virmire and pulled the trigger on himself. He fell though the glass beneath him and we all thought it was finally over. Shepard walked up to the control terminal and uploaded some of the data the prothean VI had given us. As soon as we got control, a mayday message came through from the Destiny Ascension, the ship holding the council. Shepard then heard from Joker that he was waiting for us to open the relays to the citadel. "Shepard, the council has done nothing but work against us in all this time, we need to focus on destroying Sovereign." I said, surprisingly Wrex cut in "This situation is larger than humanity, Sovereign is a threat to the whole galaxy!" I then quickly responded with "Yes, and because of that, we should not waste resources on the Ascension, we need all of the alliance to bring Sovereign down!" Separd signalled the Alliance to focus on Sovereign.

"Let's check if Saren's actually dead." The commander said and we jumped down, I watched Wrex shoot Saren's body through the head once more. I radioed Joker "Saren is dead." When suddenly the building shakes and something happens to saren's body, there was an explosion. I was sent flying and hit the wall so hard the air was knocked out of me. The commander had also landed on the ground, she was still conscious. I was about to ask what just happened when I heard the horrifying sound of ripping flesh behind me. I looked back to see Saren's dead body stretch out, an exoskeleton formed a different body from Saren's old one, ripping flesh in the process. It must have been the most haunting thing I had ever seen in my life. It looked up at us and screeched.

The thing moved swiftly, but was also very sturdy. It constantly hopped around, making it impossible to hit precisely. The commander stunned it a few times and we fired all the bullets we had. We fought with the thing for what seemed like ages. Then it finally fell down, broken and then turnedto dust. Then there is the sound of shield failing and thousands of guns firing, then a loud explosiin followed by another. The next thing we know is seeing a piece of Sovereign heading straight for us. The commander yells "RUN!" And the last thing I hear is the sound of breaking glass.

I then woke up, it was dark, I could see nothing. I heard some voices fromfar away, my body felt like it had been broken into a million pieces. A light began to shine and I saw human figures coming my way, I groaned and tried to sit up. I hissed in pain and saw Wrex getting up next to me. I then see the familiar face of captain Anderson appear and he asks something, after some processing I realized he was asking for Shepard. Feeling fear grip my heart tightly I just shook my head, unable to talk. I could feel tears coming up and suddenly the pain in my body faded to the background. A team of alliance members raised me to my feet and I just stand there. I walk with them towards the exit from the tower when a loud noise behind me catches my attention. I rapidly turn around and I see a figure stepping down from the stage, I feel the fear wash away and when Shepard comes limping towards us I can't help but run towards her. I embrace her tightly, ignoring the pain my entire body and felt relieved. Shepard chuckled and embraced me back, she then said "I'm not leaving yet, don't worry." I let go of her and press my forehead against hers, before taking her hand and walking out of the building with her and the rest of the team.

The weeks went by very quickly after that, the news of a new threat to the galaxy was spreading, and especially the news of the council dieing. Even though Saren and Sovereign had been destroyed, there were still tons of geth out there. Ofcourse we had to be the ones to destroy those too, because it was clearly not enough to destroy a reaper. We were flying close to a planet where in the past month three shops had disappeared already. I just sat at the dinner table, reading a book since there wasn't much to do. I then decided to see what was happening upstairs and went up. Pressly said something about it being stupid for us to be sent out fighting geth and the commander agreed. Then one of the crew members said "there is a ship showing up on the radar, it's right behind us." I frowned and then she continued "It is giving chase!" The commander frowned at this too. Joker said "That's impossible. The stealth system is activated!" Then Pressly said with a worried tone in his voice "No geth ship can move that quickly." The commander now looked like she was about to panic. Then Joker said, with a dark tone in his voice "Those are not geth." Then the whole ship shook and something exploded.

I began to slightly panic and the commander yelled "Joker, get us out of here !" Then another explosion and the commander yelled "TO THE ESCAPE PODS!" I turned and began sprinting for the pods when another explosion ripped through the ship and a beam entered fromthe ceiling. I cursed and followed Shepard downstairs to the pods. She put on her helmet and I yelled "Will the Alliance make it in time?" She turned around and said "We shouldn't hope for it. Get everyone into the pods!" She then grabbed a fire extinguisher and began putting out the fire, I stood there for a second and another explosion hit. "I'm staying here with you commander. Joker needs to get out of here as well." I said and as another explosion sounded through the ship, I was afraid it would tear in half. There was fire almost everywhere and she yelled "Get out of here damnit! I will haul Joker out of here myself!" I felt like leaving her now would be the bad choice but she yelled "That was an order!" And I moved out, getting the others into the pods before punching the button to send us away. I felt scared, not for myself, but for Shepard. The normandy was literally about to fall apart. We lahnched into space and I knew there was no way of turningback now, I had to trust her.

Shepard p.o.v.  
I sprinted up the stairs, panicking, I need to get to Joker. Crossing the part where the galaxy map was, I could see the planet we were so close to from a beautiful angle. But then I made my way over to Joker and hauled him out of his seat, not listening to his protests. Another loud explosion and the Normandy was ripped in half. I quickly shoved Joker into the escape pod. An even louder explosion sounded, pushing me away from the pod with the heat of our sun. I grabbed onto a ledge and punched the button as hard as I could I heard joker scream "COMMANDER!" And then he shot off, the last escape pod. I was still in space for a moment before a series of explosions shot me around like a pinball. I opened my eyes and felt myself helplessly drift through space, getting dangerously close to the nearby planet. I panicked trying to move away from it. I screamed in frustration inside my suit and then heard a loud hissing sound. Fuck, no no no no! My oxygen tank has a leak. I tried to reach it, moving my arms towards my back. I flailed, feeling the oxygen deprivation weaken me. I began to see stars and my body felt heavy, I thought, what a beautiful last sight this planet is. As a tear slipped from my eye, my vision went dark. Feeling nothing, seeing nothing, hearing nothing, being left in complete and utter darkness.

Garrus p.o.v.  
We are sitting in one of the pods right now and I am thinking back to what happened before all of this, how I spent my time with the commander. I look around me. I am in the pod with Tali, Liara and some of the maintenance crew. "What do you think happened to Shepard? She was not in one of the pods that left the station." Tali said with a slightly worried tone in her voice. "The commander has survived many things, she will make it out of this. Besides, I saw another pod shoot into space after we had been launched." Liara answers trying to keep her matter-of-fact tone, but I can see she is worried. I keep silent, I don't want to think about the odds. Instead I think back to our time together. I never expected to fall for her. I have never been particularly into humans, though I might be now because of her, but she is something different. I don't see her as 'a human' I see her as my friend, my commander and above all as my love. Losing her would be painful... but I don't need to think about that right now, there are enough problems in the galaxy.

"Look! It's the Alliance!" I hear one of the crewmembers yell. I look out of the small window in the pod and see a big Alliance ship approaching. The whole pod moves just a few minutes later. The door opens and we are all stepping out of the pod, the general of the ship confirms our identities and sends us to a room. The room we are sent to is some sort of meeting room, one by one we are called over. They examine us for wounds and they ask us questions about what happened. When it's my turn I sit down in a side room and wait for the questions. "Your name is Garrus Vakarian, right?" The general asks in a strict manner. I nod. "Please describe the last minutes in the Normandy before you had to evacuate." The general orders. I begin to speak after sitting silently for two hours "We were investigating a strange disappearance of at least three ships in the past month. There was another ship behind us, a ship that matched no logos or any ship ID. Out of nowhere it began following us, our stealth-systems still engaged-" The general cuts in "That is impossible, the Normandy was the most advanced ship in the galaxy!" I frown and continue "Then it began attacking, a beam shooting from the core of the ship. As soon as we were hit the mass effect drive cores would not activate-" the general cut in again "The pilot should have overrided the system, sent all of the power to the drive core." I irritatedly responded "The escape pods would not have been able to launch and there is no way to make sure that overriding will actually work, we would have all been dead. Then the commander ordered us all to evacuate and I followed her downstairs. She put out fire in the main processor and ordered me to leave as well. I argued and said that our pilot still needed evacuating and she responded with yelling at me to go and running up to Joker herself. I then left in the pod." I finished my story, the general then said "I think you were attacked by the geth, their ships don't match any ID either." I frowned even deeper and said " It was not a geth ship. The build of the ship was almost... organic. There is no way that the geth cokld have evolved their ships that far. " the general then said "Last time I checked you were not a ship expert. I know more about ship structure and the way it has been described I conclude that it were geth." I snarled and said with an aggressive tone "Well fine, believe that, you are no better than the council. You make the same mistake too many times. The commander warns everyone for Saren; no one believes her but it turns out to be true. We warn everyone about Sovereign; no one believes us but it turns out to be true. Make this mistake as many times as you would like, but don't come running to us to stop another galaxy-threatening attack."

I stand up and walk out of the room, leaving a wordless general to his thoughts. I enter the bigger room again and sit on one of the chairs around a big table. Most of the crew is there, Tali, Liara, Williams, doctor Chakwas and most of the shipbound crew as well. But no Joker or Shepard, I feel my heart clench painfully and try not to think of what might have happened. Some of the ship's Alliance members are walking around the room, one of them holds a datapad and is typing something. I almost got up, but then Joker came through the door. He was on his crutches and looked very bad. He had some cuts on his face and he looked very tired. Still no commander, she could still be talking to the authorities, she IS one of the most important crewmembers. I walk over to where Jokersits and I feel my heart beating in my throat as I ask him "Where is the commander?" The room falls silent and everyone turns to us. Everyone is waiting for an answer from Joker. The longer it stays silent, the more I begin to panic. Then the general walks in and orders everyone to sit down. I do as he says and sit down, still nervous and scared. But I hold onto the hope that the general will bring better news.

"We are not yet certain how many lifes were lost in the destruction of the Normandy." He pauses and looks around, uneasy. "We have gathered all survivors in this room." My heart sinks and it feels like someone just punched me right in my stomach. I hear Tali ask with a shaky voice "W-what about the commander?" I look up at the general, still foolishly hoping he will say what I want him to say and for the commander to jump through the door opening and yell 'Just kidding'. But the general looks grim and says "Commander Deya Shepard is officially deceased." He then swiftly leaves the room and I stand up. Before I know it I punch one of the walls of the ship as hard as I could, but the pain in my hand isn't even close to distract me from the pain in my heart. I feel furious, at the crew, at Joker, at the attacking ship, but most at myself. I wasn't with her when she needed me. I could have stayed. I let out a frustrated noise and punch the wall with my other hand. Then my vision becomes blurry, at first it looked as if I am going to pass out, but then I realize they are tears. I sink to the ground and silently cry, the cold tears striking over my heated skin. How could anyone believe in a higherpower when someone like Shepard dies. Who would let someonelike that die? Me. I let her die. I could have stayed with her, I SHOULD have stayed with her. Damn it. Fuck this place. I sit here for almost an hour before being escorted out of the room. I don't register anything, only the feeling of sorrow, guilt, anger, frustration and sadness. I finally let myself fall down on a bed and close my eyes, hoping they will stay this way forever like Shepard's did. 


End file.
